I need to start living as though I am a healthy person. Saving my most cherished experiences for the future, for when I am physically nourished and capable, isn’t working for me. Putting life on hold My dreams and expectations for a future overflowing with family, adventure, joy, laughter, and beauty…
Last month, I wrote about how I took the plunge into the world of sharing my perspective through video on social media. Having been socialized to feel shame, embarrassment, and even fear about sharing myself this way because of my disability, I experienced conflicting emotions about the potential ramifications.
The emergency room is not anyone’s idea of a desirable destination. When living with chronic health conditions, it is not merely undesirable, it can be a dangerous place to be. When I consider the potential repercussions of going to the hospital, I often wonder if the effort is worth…
When a family member was recently diagnosed with a potentially hereditary condition, I felt a pang of fear. Given my overwhelming list of daily symptoms and health issues, the threat of another diagnosis loomed. I’ve learned there is no cap on chaos or arbitrary line drawn between a manageable and…
In our society, we have many stipulations about the “right” conditions to love one another. So much of popular culture rhetoric revolves around the ego. Will he say it back? Should I wait for him to say it first? What if he doesn’t love me, too? On and on spins…
Over the past couple of weeks, I have walked to the edge of my cliff of insecurities and leapt into the murky waters below. I broke a rule of mine on social media: I made a video of myself. I’ve avoided filming any videos of myself since the beginning of…
Social media has a way of concealing aspects of us that are otherwise apparent in daily life. Unless pertinent to disability awareness or advocacy, I don’t often talk about having a physical disability. I choose not to do so because my disability is not important to my self-image. In previous…
“Are you retarded?” The words hung in the air as I paused, consulting my 8-year-old reflection in the mirror of the school bathroom. I exhaled, my adrenaline surging, my hands shaking as I reminded myself that she wasn’t worth it. She wasn’t worth my well-memorized, sensitive speech about cerebral palsy.
I have a face, a countenance that I reserve for speaking with doctors who are quick to discount me and teachers who doubted my intelligence. It’s the same one I wore as a teenager in my individualized education programs. Behind my unwavering expression, I keep a mindset of determination…
Advocate. This was a badge I unconsciously affixed to my vest as a child. Watching my mother fight tirelessly for my educational rights, inclusion, respect, and dignity in every sphere colored my world. Translated to me through her actions, relationships with my doctors, teachers, therapists, and every other person…